Since getting sick, last week, I have been anemic and waning. I haven't had an appetite. I woke up this morning feeling , good, almost normal.
Can I talk about having an appetite? I like women with appetites. It might not have occurred to me until recently, but the best kinds of people have big appetites.
I'm not talking about food, although maybe I am, too.
I'm not scared of food. I'm not scared to like food, to admit that it's awesome, to experiment with it, to want to share it and use it to make myself as powerful and happy as I can be.
I don't admire the trait of picking at things, at denying oneself pleasure and fullness. I don't care for the idea that women shouldn't want and love things. That they should keep themselves, including their bodies, but mostly including their personages, as small and breakable and empty as possible. That we should endeavor to be the right size to be picked up and thrown. That everything animal and pleasurable in life should be abstained from. That's it's impolite, it's improper to to be insatiable.
I believe in girls with an appetite. I believe in girls who take a big bite.
I think that maybe getting sick this week was good for me. I needed to be shaken up and out of my recent routine. I needed something drastic to remind me that I'm hungry.